To The End

so i was in the taxi for close to 5 hours and my final destination ended up being about 400yrds from when i was picked up

the taxi was for a gig in blackpool, however when we got there we couldn't find the venue ['winter gardens 2' anybody?], so i let the driver keep searching and fell asleep, a couple of hours later i wake up to the driver telling me we couldn't find it and it got a bit late so we're headed for standish instead.. 'standish' i declare ' you mad food! i can't go there, i have nowhere to sleep there.. my bed is in Preston!'

he sighs and turns off onto a dirt track towards some woods.. for a moment my mind reflects on the potential personal dangers the world has taught me such a move might bring my way, but i quickly reason that i've been asleep in alond in this cab for a couple of hours so if 'that' was gonna happen it would already have

as this drive continued there were points where i found myself strpped to the grill at the front of the taxi [which now resembled the A-Team van] as it took part in a cross country motercycle race.. there were also points where i followed behind on a hover board, taking part in the race myself before we finally approached preston from a road i'd never seen before but flanked by the most beautiful houses and streets i have ever seen whilst having an argument with the driver about his declaration that the only drop off point in preston being the Holdiay inn

dreams are fun

life is less so, of course, to the point where i'm feeling increasingly tempted to do a FilBlog where i actually write down my genuine thoughts and feelings, but as any of you who have ever become close to me only to find themselves pushed away without rhyme or reason can testify to, that is not my style so i'll simply make vague references to my continual day to day disappointments and general turgid existance.. and you'll bloody well like it.. alright?

i'm done with drinking culture.. there must be a better way than organising your mistakes and regrets [which after all is what memories are comprised of] around the bars in town, than paying increasingly attractive girls to give you toxins that make you an increasingly less respectable person, than spending daytimes lacking self-respect and night-times lacking self-restraint, than visiting the most talked about cities in the country, and the world, only to organise your experiences around the bars

not very rock and roll, and certainly at odds with the way i make my living.. 

you know you can learn to fly a helicopter for £250 and hour? that's a whole lot of cash, i reckon it'd be worth it if you could also fly and land aa helicopter in ordinary car parks so it was a practical method of transport... but it's just not... that's a shame really.... then again, seeing as it's taken me now 7 days, and counting, to get round to making a simple phonecall to arrange having my car fixed... i'm perhaps not the right person at this moment in time to be allowed to be in charge of something that can fall from the sky.. so it all works out fair in the end

i irony back in fashion? i can't keep up these days

Land of Milk and Honey

a day of laying around watching the various documentary channels is a good way to spend sunday.... plus i'm quite pleased to have watched a documentary on the crusades [human beings, it turns out, have always been absolute dicks.. but i guess we already knew that] on the same day i'll be watching a couple of episodes of 24.. nice book ends to the afternoon

also, the best thing in the world to do with an afternoon of dedicated nothingness is to look at moving pictures of marine life while david attenborough talks.. it's like aa desert of relaxation only punctuated by mild explosions in your brain as it cries 'that's pretty mental'

i haven't blogged in a while, largely because i've had nothing to say.. a theme, it seems for russell in 2007, always a fan of the 'if you've nothing worth saying keep your bastard mouth shut you boring twonk' philosophy i've always been more of a 'replier' than a 'stimulator' conversationally but i'be usually managed find either one topic of mutual interest with a person or at least a phrase colourful enough to raise a titter.. but this year it seems my mind brain is less concerned with aiding my social interaction and more involved in.. well.. bugger all really, bastard lazy grey matter i'm gonna poke it with sticks

but yeah, the lack of words to say is a problem, because there's only so much time you can spend with people not saying much before they run out of things to say to you too and from their it's a fast slippery slope to spending 4 days & nights sitting around in a blackened room eating curry in soiled pants, not sleeping and planning the slaughter of a group of people you've singled out for no oher reason than the fact they've smiled in your direction recently.. y'know.. for shits and giggles.. or because god is telling you to do it, and to do it while wearing bermuda shorts and a pair of comedy glasses & nose things

anyway

i haven't blogged.. but i have done shit... well 'a' shit if you pardon the expression.. i went to 'our nations capital'.. we played a gig.. influential people came to watch.. it was ok.. fun even.. adventures were had.. food was eaten - [oh the glorious food.. 'can i have a MEAT sandwhich please sir.. and incase that isn't enough MEAT.. can you sprinkle some MEAT in my beans too?".. and i managed to grab a few hours of time with my number 1 myspace friend [i'm so 21st century].. but that's my pleasure, not yours.. then it all went a little.. mmm... i think the locals tem is 'pete tong'

due to a combination of poor planning, lack of local transport and geographical knowledge and.. well.. intelligence... at Midnight on a Friday night in London i found myself alone, whilst my two companions were many miles away, un a part of london they didn't know, 12hours drunk, with no transport and trying to find their way to me. This left me with 2 hours with very little to do but wander around central london and soho... it started ok, i found a man to sell me a waffle... it wasn't a great waffle and a made a mess of eating it.. to the point a young woman walked past me.. pointed.. laughed and shouted 'chocolate face!'.. now whilst i did find the amusing it dealt quite a blow to me self esteem and my lust for a mirror and running water overcame me.. if this meant having to buy burger and chips in burger king.. well that would be a cross i had to bear [bare?]... then i witness a strange phenomenan that i have imaginatively titled 'the arrival of the tube workers' where by dozens of such men in high visibility jackets arrived and hung around under a giant statue of freddie mercury for up to 90minutes whilst they waited to be allowed into the tunnels under london city to do.. well..whatever it is large groups of men do a mile or so under the capital of england at night. i also witnessed what i believe is 'the most polite mugging in the world'...; 'there's no point mate, i lost my wallet', 'no it's ok, it's here somewhere' *rifles through pockets'.. bless those cheeky cockneys.

other than all that.. as capital cities go.. londons pretty dissapointing.. all very big and flash.. but pretty regimented and very expensive.. and not altogether the most beautiful of cities... of course i will give it more chances.. but for now.. i'm sticking north of hadrians wall for my big city fun times.

that's all i have to say about that.

oh yeah.. for valentines.. send me white roses not red... i have mixed feelings about the red.

x