Does liking Lily Allen make me gay?

there's been one of those 'girlfriend/boyfriend application forms' going round the bulletins today, y'know the ones that ask the most vacuous questions like height, weight, hair/eye colour, really?! i honestly couldn't tell you with any confidence the hair or eye colour of any girl i've ever been out with.. these things are clearly designed by some girl learning in typical 'just17' fashion how to be a better strumpet by adusting those details that a boy will never notice, blimey, they'll be asking about shoe type next.. why would you ever look at a girls feet? seriously, even if she's 25stone with a face like a mole there's gonna be something more interesting to look at than her feet (actually if she's 25stone chances are she can't see her feet either so shoes would be less of an issue..which is always a bonus).. when a girl walks into a room, you know what i see? shockingly.. a girl.. a collective lump of femininity.. not a miss potato head style ensemble of lips, ears and plucked eyebrows, you obsess over the details, i'll deal with the whole

what was i talking about.. how yeah.. girlfriend applications.. why do the never ask the good questions (incidentally after a quick search the best i found was this effort by brody vercher which at least made me giggle - oh and anyone who fills it in completely wins a lollypop for effort) but yeah, good questions like:

1) ok so you're mental, this is a given.. but how mental? will you make me want to kill us both on a weekly, daily, or hourly basis.

2) have you ever made a decision.. in your life? cos otherwise that's gonna send me fruity

3) have you already decided i'm cheating on you.. or will that come later?

4) does 4mins sound like a reasonable amount of time for sex to last?

5) do you understand why john waters is a genius?

you know.. the important stuff.

it's amazing what internet quizzes can teach us, i discovered the other day i was a buddhist, it wasn't such a huge shock, buddha after all is comedy fat.. and when alls said and done the nobel truths make sense.. 'life is suffering'.. well, of course. 'the cause of suffering is desire'

i'm bored of typing