You crazy kids.

so where are we now.. the optimist in me thinks i've beaten sleep by denying it's hold on me for long enough that i've spent most of this days waking hours in a semi-zombiefied state... but the realist in me understands that i'm likely to go out and indulge in a few bears this evening and with no reason to get up tomorrow i will most likely not see sunlight.. again.. returning to that oh so familiar place we all know and love by the name of 'square one', but hey, i never liked snaked and ladders much anyway

as is always the case when one shows up at work 'still' [still asleep, still drunk, still in drag] it becomes a productive day, i believe due to the fact that when you are operating on 10% mental powers you have no choice but to tunnel vision the most obvious tasks and distractions fall by the wayside, not because there aren't still time sucking face pleasing shining dancing funbeams in the corner of your eyes, but because if you turn to look at them you might fall over

as you can tell.. that 10% is diminishing

the handle to the door from my hall way to my living room has fallen off.. this means that if i at any point let that door close while i'm outside the living room the only 2 ways to access it will be to either remove the door from its frame with a slapstick style shoulder charge.. or to run up to my bedroom and abseil in.. i imagine i'll spend most of this evening out trying to make that choice by a complicated means of weighing up the mathmatics of the potential financial implications against the likely hood of broken bones and/or serious head injuries that may cause me to lie on the floor undiscovered till sunday evening... not that the idea of dying alone and uncomfortable on the kitchen floor is in itself that bad a prospect, but more it'd be a really crappy way to spend this forthcoming weeekend off

i'm gonna shower and iron a jumper

for everytime you say the word 'fat' today.. do ten sit ups before bed, tomorrow your pain will be directly proportional to your cruelness, i for one will not be able to stand up